Oh Buddy, tonight at church Sister Bobbi gave me three pictures of you I had never seen. She had told me on Wednesday that she had them and asked me if I wanted them. Of course I did and I couldn't wait to get them. Oh but B.J. when I saw them my heart broke. They were taken when you were so puffy from the steroids you were on. I know you hated being that way. My heart was torn between being glad I got more pictures and yet not wanting to see you like that. And it was torn between wanting you here with me yet knowing you were healthy in Heaven and I would never want to put you through that again. Please forgive me Buddy for being so mixed up and torn. I just miss you so much...but I don't want you to be sick. Just know I love you Buddy, I always have and I always will.
Love, Mama