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B.J.'s LegacySpecial Memories of ...Special Memories of ...Special Memories of ...Wayne and BuckMama's PoemsMama and DaddyAmandaKaylaSarahJohnathanElijah (nephew)Ian (nephew)
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| Happy Father's Day Dad! |
| The Merciful Exchanges 6/10/2010 |
Boys this is something Sarah put together and I think it's great so I wanted to share it with yall. Aren't you just so proud of your little sister? I know I am!
Love, Mama
The Merciful Exchanges
Luke 23:33-34;46
33) And when they were come to the place, which is called Calvary, there they crucified him, and the malefactors, one on the right hand, and the other on the left. 34) Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do. And they parted his raiment, and cast lots.
46) And when Jesus had cried with a loud voice, he said, Father, into thy hands I commend my spirit: and having said thus, he gave up the ghost.
First, God died. We all know that.
Acts 7:25
25) For he supposed his brethren would have understood how that God by his hand would deliver them: but they understood not.
Normally, what we as Christians tend to think is that all people know of Gods delivering power, but very few do. Just because they have God "in their heart," doesn't mean that they know the full extent of His almighty being.
So like in Acts, they didn't know God would deliver them. As Stephen exlained the plan of Moses and the deliverance not only the Hebrews had, it showed how Moses himself was delivered.
Acts 7:35
35) This Moses whom they refused, saying, Who made thee a ruler and a judge? the same did God send to be a ruler and a deliverer by the hand of the angel which appeared to him in the bush.
The Hebrews cried out and God heard them. Just like in Luke 4:18 , Stephen taught of the power and authority God has over the spiritually bound.
Luke 4:18
18) The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised, Luke 1:68-74
33) And when they were come to the place, which is called Calvary, there they crucified him, and the malefactors, one on the right hand, and the other on the left. 34) Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do. And they parted his raiment, and cast lots.
46) And when Jesus had cried with a loud voice, he said, Father, into thy hands I commend my spirit: and having said thus, he gave up the ghost.
First, God died. We all know that.
Acts 7:25
25) For he supposed his brethren would have understood how that God by his hand would deliver them: but they understood not.
Normally, what we as Christians tend to think is that all people know of Gods delivering power, but very few do. Just because they have God "in their heart," doesn't mean that they know the full extent of His almighty being.
So like in Acts, they didn't know God would deliver them. As Stephen exlained the plan of Moses and the deliverance not only the Hebrews had, it showed how Moses himself was delivered.
Acts 7:35
35) This Moses whom they refused, saying, Who made thee a ruler and a judge? the same did God send to be a ruler and a deliverer by the hand of the angel which appeared to him in the bush.
The Hebrews cried out and God heard them. Just like in Luke 4:18 , Stephen taught of the power and authority God has over the spiritually bound.
Luke 4:18
18) The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised, Luke 1:68-74
68) Blessed be the Lord God of Israel; for he hath visited and redeemed his people, 69) And hath raised up an horn of salvation for us in the house of his servant David; 70) As he spake by the mouth of his holy prophets, which have been since the world began: 71) That we should be saved from our enemies, and from the hand of all that hate us; 72) To perform the mercy promised to our fathers, and to remember his holy covenant; 73) The oath which he sware to our father Abraham, 74) That he would grant unto us, that we being delivered out of the hand of our enemies might serve him without fear,
This is where we see the promises of deliverance. A covenant/oath was like swearing something. In Gods eyes, it was something that could not be broken under any terms.
So we see in Luke that God started his covenant/oath from salvation in Davids house, and blessings from Abrahams.
Matthew 1:21
21) And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name JESUS: for he shall save his people from their sins.
This is our promise! The promise of deliverance. God is our deliverer, and by His birth and the prophesy of His saving grace, it is fufilled.
Hebrews 7:25
25) Wherefore he is able also to save them to the uttermost that come unto God by him, seeing he ever liveth to make intercession for them.
He is able to save them to the uttermost. Broken down to its origianal form, uttermost becomes utmost, which in Websters Dictionary mean "the greatest or most distant." Guess what? That means you're not too far from God!!
Romans 6:8-14
8) Now if we be dead with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with him: 9) Knowing that Christ being raised from the dead dieth no more; death hath no more dominion over him. 10) For in that he died, he died unto sin once: but in that he liveth, he liveth unto God. 11) Likewise reckon ye also yourselves to be dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord. 12) Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, that ye should obey it in the lusts thereof. 13) Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin: but yield yourselves unto God, as those that are alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness unto God. 14) For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace.
When we come to God, nothing else matters but our relationship with Him! In verse 14 it specifically says "For sin shall not have dominion over you..."
Ezra 9:8
8) And now for a little space grace hath been shewed from the LORD our God, to leave us a remnant to escape, and to give us a nail in his holy place, that our God may lighten our eyes, and give us a little reviving in our bondage.
So many people are bound with the things of this world. From X-Box, to music, to lust, to drugs, depression, or many other things. If it takes away from time with God, you're bound. Ezra 9:8 clearly states that the nails put into Gods hands was so that we would not be held down by the things of this world, but by His word.
Gods exchange with us is simple. He went to the cross with our eternal guarentee to hell. He put His time, love, energy, but most importantly His life into our unmerciful hands. This was His choice, and now our eternity is secured by the nails and crown of thorns that held Him to the cross. This is our deliverance. Our promise. But God rose. His resurrection exemplifies the way we should exploit ourselves to this world. Yes, we get bound and we fall, but by the loving grace of God, and with His helping hands, we may rise. We may overcome.
| You little brothers fish... |
We took the kids fishing on Memorial Day. Johnathan caught two fish, a little one and a big one. When we tried to take pictures of Johnathan holding them he was scared. I'll explain "why" under the pictures.
Johnathan was afraid to hold his little fish so I had to hold it first to show him it wouldn't hurt him. I couldn't understand why he was so afraid of it...I found out later.
When I tried to get him to hold this big fish he wasn't just afraid of it he was terrified. Again I had to help him hold it at first to show him he didn't have to be afraid. Again I wondered why...
So then he's holding it and it starts moving...look at the look on his face! He has the same look as his fish. lol I had to take the fish and he had blood on his hand from the fish and he freaked out and started running and screaming wanting it washed off.
When he got ready for bed that night he told me Mom...you remember when I was afraid of those fish...I said yes. He said it's cause when I caught the first little one Dad told me I had to be careful of those poky things (fins) because if I let them cut me I would have to go to the hospital. And then when I held the big one and saw the blood I ...thought it was me bleeding. I told him but Johnathan you didn't feel any pain. He said well I didn't know if you were suppose to feel pain or not...all I know is I thought I was bleeding and Dad said I would have to go the the hospital. Oh my!!! He took Dad too serious...poor little guy.
So I go ask Daddy about it and he said yes he told him that but he didn't think he took him that serious. But he said when Johnathan caught the big one and it was flopping in the boat Johnathan dove to the other end to get away from it and was yelling over and over "protect me Jesus"! I felt bad for him...he needed to be careful but not be terrified. So now Mama has explained and I don't think we'll have this problem next time.
| 8 years ago today May 31st 2002 |
B.J. you graduated 8 years ago today on May 31st 2002. *sigh* you were suppose to have your whole life ahead of you. I guess you did...I just wanted it to be more than a year and a half. Sure miss you Buddy. :( Oh but I'm proud of you as school didn't come easy for you with your health problems. You were never a quiter...and you're so blessed now. As much as I miss you I can't begrudge you that. Enjoy my son...Love, Mama
| One more to share with you. :) 5/24 |
Here's another one I wanted to share with you. Johnathan is doing good isn't he?Love, Mama
| Look what your 'lil brother got! 5/24 |
Oh Buddy aren't you just so proud of Johnathan? And isn't Jesus just so good? He's the first one of you kids to ever get perfect attendance and he had such a hard start in life with his health. I'm so thankful. Thank you for coming to his awards ceremony today...the "Melodies from Heaven" let us know you were there.Love, Mama
| B.J. Outlaw |
The angels came and ushered me into God's presence, dear mama.
They carried me like you did when I would fall asleep.
I awoke into the arms of Jesus,
the One who gave His life for me!
It's so beautiful up here, mama;
so beautiful like you've always said!
A pure river of life, clear as crystal forever flowing,
proceeding out of the throne of God.
So overwhelmed with His love was I, dear mama!
Imagine my joy seeing Jesus face to face!
His smile so warm...
His face so radiant...
"Welcome home My child!" He tenderly said.
Oh, don't be sad for me, mama.
I can run and jump and
dance and sing!
I feel so light on my feet like I'm dreaming, mama!
Sometimes I laugh as I dance in the presence of the angels.
The curse of death has lost its sting.
Oh, don't cry for me so, mama.
Your teardrops fall like the summer rain.
Death is sorrowful with its separation.
Cry for a while, but not as those in vain.
Although God called me home so early,
with so many dreams we had, so many songs unsung.
I'll be in your heart, in your cherished memories.
The moments we had will carry you through.
Remember when at bedtime I'd crawl up in your bed?
You would tell me stories of Jesus and the love for us He had.
I looked into your face as you read to me in the candlelight.
"Will the angels come to carry me home too, mama?"
You chuckled teasingly, ruffling my hair.
"Yes, my little angel, but you have to wait!
Trust Him as your Savior,
in His blood that was shed for you."
On bended knees you prayed for me,
a tear splashed down your cheek.
"Was that a tear mama?" I asked you softly.
You looked away from me.
A tender sigh escaped your lips
gathering your thoughts together...
" Yes, my little angel, tears in my heart water my prayers."
you said softly, kissing me goodnight.
That night when you prayed for me
I got down on my knees.
The moonlight danced on the wooden floors
when I asked God to save me.
Although I didn't know what to say at first,
I remember what you said.
"Pray from your heart, dear child."
you said tenderly, turning to the door to leave.
Jesus came into my life that night, dear mama!
In the darkness, I could feel you smile.
Bells rang for me in heaven!
My name written in the book of life.
So don't cry for me, dear mama,
I'm here in heaven because of you.
Jesus needs you now, for there are my brothers.
There's more work on earth for you to do.
One day when your work is over
the angels will come to carry you
safely into the arms of Jesus,
the One who loved and died for you.
| Love Notes in Balloons 5/18/2010 |
We'll be sending our love notes to Heaven this evening at around 7:30 so you boys be watching for them. I'm also putting mine here just in case your ballons get lost along the way.
Love, Mama
B.J. there is no way simple words can let you know how much I love you and miss you. But you know your Mama so I know you understand what I mean. It's been almost 6 1/2 years since you've been gone and I miss you more every day. I know some things will never change and that's one of them. Please keep watching for me Buddy cause I'll be there just as soon as Jesus says I can. I can't wait to see you again. I'll love you forever and always.
Love, Mama
Sweet Wayne and Buck, I love you too...just as much as your brother. I can't wait to be with you in Heaven and "really" hold you in my arms for the first time. It's been over 24 years and I still think of you every single day and miss you more all the time. Remember Mama loves her "bitty boys" and I will forever.
Love, Mama
Forever loving and missing my 3 boys...B.J., Wayne and Buck
http://bobby-outlawii.last-memories.com http://bjoutlawii.memory-of.com
| Happy 26th Birthday B.J. |
Happy Birthday Buddy. What I'd give if you could only be here. I'm making two Chocolate Pudding Pies for your birthday cause Sarah says one isn't enough. I sure wish you were here to help us eat them. I hope you're having some in Heaven today...tell Jesus to let you as a birthday gift from your Mama ok.
I love you so much, Mama
| Three Trees |
Once there were three trees on a hill in the woods. They were discussing their hopes and dreams when the first tree said, "Someday I hope to be a great treasure chest. I could be filled with gold, silver and precious gems. I could be decorated with an intricate carving and everyone would see the beauty." Then the second tree said, "Someday I will be a mighty ship. I will take Kings and Queens across the waters and sail to the corners of the world. People will feel safe in me because of the strength of my hull." Finally the third tree said, "I want to grow to be the tallest and straightest tree in the forest. People will see me on top of the hill, look up to my branches, and think of the heavens and God and how close to them I am reaching. I will be the greatest tree of all time and people will always remember me." After a few years of praying that their dreams would come true, a group of woodsmen came upon the trees. When one came to the first tree he said, "This looks like a strong tree, I think I should be able to sell the wood to a carpenter" and he began cutting it down. The tree was happy, because he knew the carpenter would make him into a treasure chest. At the second tree the woodsman said, "This looks like a strong tree. I will be able to sell it to the shipyard." When the woodsmen came upon the third tree, the tree was frightened because he knew that if they cut him down his dreams would not come true. One of the men said, "I don't need anything special from my tree, I'll take this one," and he cut it down. When the first tree arrived at the carpenters, he was made into a feed box for animals. He was then placed in a barn and filled with hay. This was not at all what he had prayed for. The second tree was cut and made into a small fishing boat. His dreams of being a mighty ship and carrying Kings had come to an end. The third tree was cut into large pieces, and left alone in the dark. The years went by, and the trees forgot about their dreams. Then one day, a man and woman came to the barn. She gave birth and they placed the baby in the hay in the feed box that was made from the first tree. The man wished that he could have made a crib for the baby, but this manger would have to do. The tree could feel the importance of this event and knew that it had held the greatest treasure of all time. Years later, a group of men got in the fishing boat made from the second tree. One of them was tired and went to sleep. While they were out on the water, a great storm arose and the tree didn't think it was strong enough to keep the men safe. The men woke the sleeping man, and he stood and said "Peace" and the storm stopped. At this time,the tree knew that it had carried the King of Kings in its boat. Finally, someone came and got the third tree. It was carried through the streets as the people mocked the man who was carrying it. When they came to a stop, the man was nailed to the tree and raised in the air to die at the top of a hill. When Sunday came, the tree came to realize that it was strong enough to stand at the top of the hill and be as close to God as was possible, because Jesus had been crucified on it.
The second tree was happy because he knew he was on his way to becoming a mighty ship.
The moral of this story is that when things don't seem to be going your way, always know that God has a plan for you. If you place your trust in Him, God will give you great gifts.
Each of the trees got what they wanted, just not in the way they had imagined.
We don't always know what God's plans are for us. We just know that His Ways are not our ways, but His ways are always best.
| Happy Mother's Day Mama May 9, 2010 |
| Mother's Day May 9, 2010 |
Forever loving and missing my boys...I sure wish you were here.
Love, Mama
| Wayne and Buck 5/8/2010 |
What Makes a Mother?
What Makes A Mother
I thought of you and closed my eyes
And prayed to God today,
I asked, "What makes a Mother?"
And I know I heard him say:
A Mother has a baby,
This we know is true
But, God, can you be a mother
When your baby's not with you?
Yes, you can, he replied
With confidence in his voice,
I give many women babies,
When they leave it is not their choice.
Some I send for a lifetime,
And others for the day,
And some I send to feel your womb,
But there's no need to stay.
I just don't understand this God,
I want my baby here.
He took a breath,
and cleared his throat,
And then I saw a tear.
I wish I could show you,
What your child is doing Here...
If you could see your child smile
With other children and say,
"We go to earth to learn our lessons
of love and life and fear,
but My mommy loved me so much
I got to come straight here!"
I feel so lucky to have a Mom
who had so much love for me,
I learned my lessons very quickly,
My Mommy set me free.
I miss my Mommy oh so much
But I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep,
On her pillow is where I lay.
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek,
And whisper in her ear,
"Mommy, Please don't be sad today,
I'm your baby and I am here"
So you see my dear sweet one,
Your children are okay.
Your babies are here in My home,
And this is where they'll stay.
They'll wait for you with Me,
Until your lessons there are through,
And on the day that you come home,
they'll be at the gates waiting for you
So now you see
What makes a Mother,
It's the feeling in your heart,
It's the love you had so much of
Right from the very start.
Author Unknown
In loving memory of my sweet Wayne and Buck. Today was your actual due date 24 years ago but you came too early on Jan. 26,1986 and did not survive. I love you and miss you so much.
Love, Mama
| It's been 7 years today. 5/6/2010 |
B.J. it's been 7 years ago today since you had your kidney transplant. When Dad gave you his kidney he wanted so much for it to make you well...we all did. No matter how much times goes by I still have such a hard time believing you're really not coming back yet I know you're not and I can't stand it. I miss you so much. It wasn't suppose to turn out like this.
I love you, Mama
| Memories...4/30/2003 |
I think there are some things that I'm just never going to handle well. Your Dad went to the doctor this week for his checkup and they said his blood pressure was up some and they want him to check it twice a week for a while to watch it. So...that means we had to bring out your blood pressure monitor. I didn't much like the idea but it's needed so I was ok with it...I thought. I run to the store and buy new batteries for it and get it ready...and then it hits me. We bought that for you B.J. after you had your transplant (7 years ago next week). It's still almost new as for as use. I'm angry! I don't want you sick B.J. but I want you here. It's been too long and it's not fair. I miss you so much.
Love, Mama
| Johnathan's 1st Baseball Game 4/29/2003 |
Well boys your little brother played his first game and the other team won 3-1 but it sure was fun watching them play. Doesn't Johnathan look so cute in his little uniform?
Love, Mama
| Your little brother...4/26/2010 |
Well your little brother played his first scrimage in baseball today against the other Goldthwaite team. The other team won but it was sure a lot of fun to watch. I hope you were watching him play...I sure wish you were here. His first real game is this Thursday the 29th and he'll be playing against the same team again.
Love, Mama
| LaLa |
I thought of you with love today, but that is nothing new. I thought about you yesterday, and days before that too. I think of you in silence, I often speak your name. All I have are memories, and a picture in a frame. Your memory is a keepsake, with which I'll never part. God has you in His keeping, I have you in my heart..
| The Train |
Oh Buddy the two engine train that came by during Johnathan's baseball practice today was great! I know you were letting us know you were there to watch him...thank you.
He's got his uniform now...he's playing for the White Sox team. I'm leaving you a picture of him here. His first game is Saturday morning...be sure and be there!
Love, Mama
| Johnathan's target practice...4/12/2010 |
Boys I spent time outside this evening raking old pecans out of the yard. Your little brother decided to prove he is already a true "Outlaw". He was on top of an old refrigerator on the back porch shooting at the pecans "I" was raking up with his BB Gun. That silly boy...he keeps my life interesting to say the least. It was nice being outside and thank goodness he didn't miss his targets and get me. 
Of course I threatened him but that's beside the point.
I know you three were probably watching and having a great time laughing...you're little brother is a nut! But I love him just like I love all three of yall.
Love, Mama
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